How can something as good as popcorn have a dark side?  I made my fluffy paper lunch bag pop corn Friday night and I guess a hull got stuck up inside my gum.  I woke up Saturday with swollen and sore gums.  Flossing didn’t help and I wonder if it pushed the hull up even farther. This morning I woke up with a headache on the same side and even more pain and swelling.  I called my dentist’s office and left a message asking where I could go today for emergency hull extraction. She called back and said I was her second call this weekend for popcorn hulls (who knew?) and told me to rinse with hot salt water and put some Anbesol on it. I also took a Tylenol. It helped a lot, in fact I don’t know if the hull came out or if I’m just masking the pain and it’s still up there. That’s why I’m not big on pain pills because masking the pain doesn’t solve the problem.  You have to find the cause and fix that. If I could see it, maybe I could do something but I can’t see up there in the back. Well, I know this will pass but the bigger issue is what will this trauma do to my popcorn-enjoying experience?  Will I be overcome by anxiety? Will I hesitate before every crunchy bite?  Should I chew and floss between each bite? Should I eat it one piece at a time and first remove the hull? I LOVE popcorn.  Will life ever be the same? Will I have to snack on pudding?

I was driving down Ventura Boulevard today when I saw a bicycle coming up in my side view mirror.  It was going pretty fast and I was a little jealous because he was making better time than I was.  When I stopped at a red light, he pulled up next to my window and I thought “This guy is NOT trying to make a move on me!  Could he be a fan who recognized me and wants an autograph?  Maybe he’s lost and needs directions.”  Then I saw the badge. He motioned for me to roll down my window. “I’m officer Boyles with the LAPD.  Can I see your drivers license please?”  WHAT?? I didn’t do anything!  Did I cut him off?  Did I not make a full stop?  Was I stopped over the pedestrian line? Maybe my plates were expired. “Is there any reason you’re not wearing your seatbelt?” he said. “Damn you!” I said. “I was just going to Whole Foods. I don’t see you strapped onto your bike!”  Okay, I didn’t say it out loud, but I thought it. – What I said out loud was: “My only reason is stupidity, officer.  I know I deserve a ticket.”  Officer Boyles was kind enough to let me off with a warning but I have learned my lesson.  Whether you wear a seatbelt for safety or to avoid a ticket, you’ve gotta do it.  What he didn’t see was I had just gotten off the cellphone (also illegal in CA).  If he had seen that, I’d be blogging from the big house.

My stepmom’s husband’s daughter, Alex, came to town yesterday and had never been to Beverly Hills.  She had always heard about Spago and it was her dream to go there some day.  So we went.  We had lunch in the patio and it was everything a place like Spago should be.  Valet parking, gracious service, and fantastic food. She had the lobster club and I had Wolfgang’s famous schnitzel.  We shared a dessert that looked like an art display on a plate – something with a sheet of chocolate, cherries, pistachios, and sorbet.  It was too beautiful to eat but that didn’t stop us. After lunch, we went down Rodeo Drive for the full Beverly Hills experience.  There was even an armored truck in front of Van Cleef & Arpels. Oh, and back at the house we had a 5.4 magnitude earthquake so she had the full SoCal experience.

I once thought that my Alligator Lizard confrontation was the most harrowing thing to happen but no so, my friends.  My housekeeper came to work this morning with her camera-phone.  “Guess what was in my front yard yesterday?” she said. “An iguana.” Of course I assumed she meant a lizard that LOOKED like an iguana, after all my lizard looked like a rattlesnake to me. Then she produced evidence (I couldn’t take the photo off her phone) but this was definitely an iguana – a big one.  The neighbor told her he saw one in her palm tree the day before but then he drinks a lot, so she wasn’t sure.  Then yesterday she was gardening and “HELLO!”  There it was.  She said she almost fell over. “Corri y grite,” she said. She ran and screamed. Anyway, her cousin came over and took it away. Her iguana trumps my lizard for sure.  What’s next?  A bear?  Oh right, there are bears going into local trash cans.  Coyotes?  Been there.  Bobcat? Done that. Mountain lion? Just down the street. Yes, Beverly Hills is paradise.

I celebrated Independence Day by making my fall-of-the-bone  baby back ribs.  There’s enough for leftovers tomorrow!  I also made potato salad, cole slaw, fresh corn, homemade bread,  and we had fudge bars for dessert.  I found some by “Skinny Cow” and they were low fat and really good. The meaning of the day was not lost, though.  I remembered today, as I do every day, how lucky we are to live in this country and we should never take our freedoms for granted. I am grateful for many things, every day.

The bees are finally gone and my agapanthus flowers are opening up.  Life is good.  I’m taking pictures and baking cookies again. My cookbook got delayed the last few weeks but I’m back on track, hoping to get the recipes all done, tested, and written up by the end of the year.  I still get emails from people who really liked my first cookbook but one email jolted my ego a bit. “I bought your cookbook for a dollar at a garage sale and love your recipes. It’s my new go-to book.” Huh??…. Oh no you didn’t…..  A dollar??…. A garage sale??…. How is that supposed to make me feel?  Is that a compliment or was this hate mail?  I’m still trying to decide how I feel.

Last night I was craving Mexican food so we went to El Torito.  We’ve been there over the years and it was always dependable so this time, I was even going to have a margarita. That was my first mistake but I’ll get to that later. They fry their own tortilla chips and brought those first, so greasy they had a sheen.  They should have served them with latex gloves.  The main reason for going to El Torito is they make guacamole at your table.  The guacamolier put in too much salt, so now we have bad guacamole on an oil-slicked chip. But my margarita (I rarely drink alcohol) was keeping my standards low as I awaited my crispy tacos.  Did I say crispy?  Imagine the greasy tortilla chips only bigger. And heavier.  I picked one up and the weight & viscosity caused the bottom to fall out into a greasy mess.  The Gulf of Mexico came to mind.  Was it the Mexican food, or was it the oil slick on my plate?  By the end of my margarita, I imagined the kitchen staff washing pelicans in the back sink.  When we got up to leave, I felt a bit dizzy (of course – alcohol on an empty stomach!) and only wanted to take a nap.  Or eat.  The next time I crave Mexican food and see an El Torito, I’ll make like that west Texas town… el Pass-o.

The bees are back. The exterminators have been here three times, they removed the hive from the attic, they sprayed inside and out, and they came back a third time just to say “good riddance.” So last night I went in my bathroom and there were a dozen bees flying around.  Actually, there was a dead one on my toothbrush!!  Yughkk!! My bathroom is directly below that section of the attic and when you turn on the ceiling lights, it draws the bees. They are mocking me and I don’t like it, but I will win this one.

My stepmom and her husband have been here for two weeks and can hardly wait to get home, but they drove here in their own car.   After his final checkup today, I thought her husband would be hospitalized again because he’s not recovering as well as we hoped, but he refused to be re-admitted and wants to go home.  He can’t drive in his condition, and the idea of my stepmom driving to Las Vegas is…. well, read my blog entry of June 19th.  Without any hesitation, my boyfriend and life partner said to them, “Let’s get in the car, I’ll take you home right now.” They were packed in about 20 minutes and they all left at 7:45 p.m.  It’s 10 p.m. right now and they’re only half way there.  Since there were no late flights for him to get back, he’s renting a car and driving back tonight… well, tomorrow really. He’ll be back in the middle of the night.  They are not his family, they’re mine, but this is the kind of man I have.  I’ve always known he would do anything for me, or someone in need, but I realized tonight just how special he really is.  I know he will always be there for me and I know that not everyone is lucky enough to have that.  I’m going to try and wait up.

Yesterday, my stepmom insisted she wanted to drive to the drug store.  I offered to take her but she didn’t want me to so I drew her a map and it was only two turns. It should have taken 1/2 hour but she was gone for almost two hours but did get home safely.  I asked how the drive was and she said, “Boy, the drivers here are so rude, always honking at everybody.”  I said, “Do you think they were honking at you?”  She said, “Oh no, they weren’t honking at me – it was for other people.”