This is a number I never expected to reach. The new total after today’s pick is 7,008! I used to joke about still picking tomatoes on Christmas Day but that’s exactly what’s going to happen. There are still hundreds of green ones but guess what? There are new branches still popping up with yellow flowers, waiting to become even more tomatoes. I’m tired. I think I hate tomato soup now. People are avoiding me, afraid I’ll show up with another bag of tomatoes. “Here comes Farmer Jones again with another sack. Quick! Lights off, shades down, nobody’s home.”

I was walking through the house today and spotted this thing on the floor which at first I thought was just some debris so I kept walking. Then I decided to take a second look. What is that? I bent over to look at it and couldn’t decide if it was a bug or not. I put on my glasses to get a better look and still couldn’t tell. The magnifying glass was next, with my glasses, on my knees (but not too close) but I still couldn’t be sure. Was it a walking stick? They blend into trees and sticks and this one was camouflaged to match my floor. It wasn’t moving but I was still afraid to walk away so I put a glass over it for Denis to deal with. When he came home he told me it was a grape stem but I think he was lying not to freak me out. He found a scorpion in the house once and never told me so his credibility is clearly questionable. He knew I would have wanted to move. So what was that? I still think it was something but I’ll never be sure…

July 11th – 150 tomatoes

July 17th – 459

July 24th – 785

July 29th – 1,014

Aug. 4th – 1,415

Aug. 8th – 1,646

Aug. 10th – 1,721

Aug. 11th – 1,861

Aug. 12th – 1,925

Aug. 13th – 2,002

Aug. 14th – 2,078 (this —> picture was taken today)

Aug. 15th – 2,201

Aug. 16th – 2,352

Aug. 17th – 2,454

Aug. 18th – 2,599

Aug. 19th – 2,735

Aug. 20th – 2,855

Aug. 21st – 2,932

Aug. 22nd – 3,077

Aug. 23rd – 3,178

Aug. 26th – 3,218

Aug. 27th – 3,251

Aug. 28th – 3,286

Aug. 29th – 3,360

Aug. 31st – 3,402

Sept. 2nd – 3,439

Sept. 3rd – 3,462

Sept. 4th – 3,511

Sept. 5th – 3,576

Sept. 6th – 3,612

Sept. 7th – 3,664

Sept. 8th – 3,710

Sept. 9th – 3,795

Sept. 10th – 3,850

Sept. 11th – 3,902

Sept. 12th – 3,936

Sept. 13th – 4,007!!! OMG!!! – over 4,000 – heading for 5,000!!

Sept. 14th – 4,050

Sept. 15th – 4,086

Sept. 16th – 4,114

Sept. 17 – 4,146

Sept. 18 – 4,171

Sept. 19 – 4,189

Sept. 20 – 4,207

Sept. 21 – 4,219

Sept. 22 – 4,232

Sept. 23 – 4,260

Sept. 24 – 4,282

Sept. 25 – 4,300

Sept. 26 – 4,321

Sept. 27 – 4,352

Sept. 28 – 4,392

Sept. 29 – 4,429

Sept. 30 – 4,502

Oct. 1 – 4,529

Oct. 2 – 4,569

Oct. 3 – 4,628

Oct. 4 – 4,664

Oct. 5 – 4,701

Oct. 6 – 4,776

Oct. 7 – 4,828

Oct. 8 – 4,914

Oct. 9 – 4,980

Oct. 10 – 5,000

Oct. 11 – 5,082

Oct. 12 – 5,153

Oct. 13 – 5,202

Oct. 14 – 5,230

Oct. 15 – 5,281

Oct. 16 – 5,347

Oct. 17 – 5,366

Oct. 18 – 5,492

Oct. 20 – 5,538

Oct. 21 – 5,569

Oct. 22 – 5,618

Oct. 23 – 5,648

Oct. 24 – 5,691

Ot. 25 – 5,741

Oct. 26 – 5,791

Oct. 27 – 5,843

Oct. 28 – 5,874

Oct. 29 – 5,907

Oct. 30 – 5,945

Oct. 31 – 6,007

Nov, 2 – 6,041

Nov. 4 – 6,145

Nov. 6 – 6,243

Nov. 7 – 6,342

Nov. 8 – No more updates due to upcoming contest

Nov. 22 – (Thanksgiving Day) 6,703

Nov. 27 – 6,845

Nov. 30 – 6,929

Dec. 2 – 6,970

Dec. 4 – 7,008

Dec. 6 – 7,029

Dec. 9 – 7,061

Dec. 12 – 7,117

Dec. 15 – 7,135

Dec. 19 – 7,185

Dec. 21 – 7,224

Dec. 27 – 7,264

Jan. 2 – 7,303

Jan. 7 – 7,338

Jan. 9 – 7,379

Jan. 13 – 8,121! (FINAL) That’s all she wrote!!!

This picture was taken Sept. 6th

No matter how you pronounce it, I sure have a lot. Here’s the latest on my monster cherry tomato plant:

I picked 98 yesterday and 91 today.

The new total is 6,432 and I’m pretty sure it will reach 7,000.

Here it is today.

There is definitely a contest coming!

“Let’s go see Book of Mormon,” I said.

“It’s playing at the Pantages in Hollywood,” I said.

“Let’s go Halloween night,” I said. “No one goes to the theater on Halloween.”

“Com’on! It’ll be fun. All the Halloween craziness will be down on Santa Monica.”

“Puhleeeeze? I promise, it’s not a mistake to go to Hollywood on Halloween night.”

“No, we have to go. I already got the tickets.”

“Don’t worry. Traffic will be fine. You’ll thank me later.”

“Stop worrying. What could go wrong?”

I didn’t feel a thing.

But two earthquakes in one day?

The closest one was around 8 this morning and I was still asleep. It was a 3.9 with five aftershocks.

The other one hit overnight last night but it was farther away. I can’t complain about these minor earthquakes when Hurricane Sandy is headed for the east coast at the same time. They are predicting it with such precision but I’m still hoping that winds may change and it won’t be the “perfect storm” that appears to be looming. We can only hope.

I actually like grocery shopping. Now that I’m not on TV, I come and go to the grocery store and Whole Foods, enjoying the fact that no one recognizes me, allowing me to go out in sweat pants, a pony tail, and no makeup. I look more like someone who works for a celebrity. So last week I went to my regular Whole Foods and as I was checking out, the checker says to me, “You’re buying more today than you usually do.” I’ve shopped there for years but was surprised that she would remember a customer’s buying habits. “You actually remember what your customers buy?” I asked. “Oh,” she said, “when a celebrity comes in, I usually remember.” Say what??? But I’m not famous any more! There are no makeup & hair people at my house! I come in here and none of the staff even glances at me! It was shocking because all this time, I thought I was invisible there. I guess I was living in denial. I suddenly realized that anyone with a cell phone could take my picture and I could find myself featured  in “Stars Without Makeup,” or they would create a new section just for me called “Stars Without Mirrors.”

I started looking over my shoulder when she stunned me even more. “When a celebrity shops here, people always want to know what they bought.” Com’on! Are you serious? So now I have to edit my shopping list? AND comb my hair? The checker assured me she never tells people what celebs are buying but what about all the other checkers? And the other Whole Foods? And grocery stores? And oh the horrors… the drug store! Can I ever buy red vines again? Hair remover? An enema? I don’t think so.

It finally happened! I just picked my 5,000th tomato!  And the plant is still going strong! I’m either in the kitchen or outside picking tomatoes. The gardener just said it could go until Christmas. If so, then I know what I want for Christmas… I want my life back! …and a sweater for my bunny.

I did something today I’ve never done before. I bought a bra… at the drug store! I wasn’t looking for underwear but there it was, on a hanger just like at the mall stores. It was the same style that I wear. There was only one left. And it was my size. It was meant to be! I was either lucky to get the last bra, or I’ve hit a new low in lingerie selection. Waiting in the checkout line, all I could think was please, don’t let this be the day someone sees me and says, “Hey, aren’t you Jenny Jones? I used to watch your talk show,” while their inside voice is saying, “How sad. Jenny must have hit some hard times buying her underwear at Walgreens!” I haven’t tried it on yet (how about some fitting rooms at the drug store?) but it looks like a good bra. And when there’s only one left of anything, it always means it’s something good, right? …except when you’re buying fish.

It’s 100 degrees and sunny and I just picked 73 more tomatoes for a new total of 4,502!!

It’s still growing new branches and there are still hundreds of new ones coming.

It’s absolutely mind boggling. And it’s going to be over 100 degrees the next couple of days so who know what will happen.

Shouldn’t I qualify for a farmer’s tax break?